DO NOT COME TO A CONCLUSION.

Each and everyone would be having opinion about visually challenged people. We welcome it. But, how far they are true is the question. I observe different people have opinions on us and felt like sharing a few here.

I believe; nobody in the world, except a visually challenged person can understand the other visually challenged survivor. The examples are many and invariably sound funny. This post makes an attempt of discussing this funny incident which is inwardly painful.

Last week, I had got a job notification in a Whats app group. The informer was my close friend. I contacted her and she gave me another number to contact. I contacted the concerned employer over the phone to approach a job for visually impaired friend. His reply didn’t startle me in any mean but forced me to muse on the real ground.

“Actually,” he replied over the phone, “Even I’m astonished to come across various visually challenged persons and skills. They’re much capable than normal people I agree. They do certain things which can’t be done by normal people. They’re very talented indeed. Even I know a visually challenged person who is a very close friend to me. He’s working in a college as a lecturer.”

After saying all those things, he continued,

“ But, when it comes to school, I feel, it is tough for a visually challenged teacher to manage as it will be difficult to handle school students. They will not obey. Moreover, the teacher has to move from building to building for every period which will be difficult for them.” He finished.

I didn’t oppose him and quietly listened to his words. The summary of his detailed narration was that there was no vacancy for visually challenged candidates. I said I’d try for normal candidates if possible. He was keen to hear that word from me and asked me to find a normal person for his school. I suggested a couple of candidates also.

Challenges are everywhere and they are common to everyone. The only difference is the different types of challenges to different people. There are plenty of visually challenged teachers working as teachers in government school and showing more than eighty percent result in their subjects, that too handling mischievous and irresponsible students. On the other hand, private school students may not be as disobedient as government school students due to strict rules and punishments. But, I notice the irony in the rejection.

Let the job issue be aside. Yesterday, one of my best friends called me. We were talking about various issues and people. We were talking about a particular person. I said I hate that person to the core yet he didn’t do any harm to me. I said I didn’t even like to talk to him over the phone when he talked.

My friend immediately posed a very shocking question after listening to me.

“What’s your problem in talking to him over the phone? Moreover, you can’t even see his face.” May be, he would have thought that the rage resides in faces. I wondered, in fact, jolted and replied that the face has nothing to do with anger.

The same person was having a conversation with me while I was doing my post graduation. While talking he said,

“When we went for a tour in our under graduation, few students had really taken care of you with at most care and concern.” I never denied his statement which was actually true. But, his following utterance gave me an actual shock. He said,

“They didn’t even enjoy the tour.”

I said not even a single word against his statement and digested it without any question. But, the whole day my mind was asking a question to me. “How can a visually challenged student become a barrier to a sighted student by preventing his joy?” There is a possibility of delay only if the visually challenged student is a slow walker. And that too will not cost more than five minutes if everything properly executed.

No visually challenged student is going to prevent a non-visually challenged student from enjoying the tour. In fact, the sighted students will remember what they have seen when they narrate it to a visually challenged student. The only problem would be the holding the hand of a visually challenged student and making him walking that too may not disrupt the joy of the escort. Am I not correct?

I am reminded of another painful incident when I talk about tour. It was a different pain to me. While I was in my postgraduation, we had gone for an educational tour to Ooty. You should implicitly believe when I say it’s an educational tour without any research. Students were left in the garden. We spent nearly three to four hours in the garden. At one point of time, some of my friends started playing blind bluff. The eyes of the catcher has to be folded and he/she should catch the rest is the rule of the game. I wanted to play as the game was very easy and very familiar to me as I was visually challenged. I ask my friend to bring the blind folder. But he didn’t want to bring and he didn’t want me to play. I said I want to join. He said no. I asked him the reason. He didn’t say anything and handed over his digital camera to me and joined them to happily play. I even asked him, “Everybody is blind when the eyes are folded. Then, why shouldn’t I play?” He didn’t say anything except “no” and hindered me from the game. I felt really jealous when those boys and girls were playing and catching one another with their folded eyes.

Blind bluff was just a temporary game for them. But, it’s a lifetime game for me. Who else can play the game as I play? A blind person was not allowed to play blind bluff could be an indigestible irony I feel. I agree that my friend didn’t want anybody to show sympathy on me when my eyes were folded. But the truth was what he did was an absolute outcome of sympathy. Isn’t it?

Another incident comes to my mind which is also relevant to game when I think about this blind bluff.

One day, I had gone to one of my best friends’ house. There was a carrom board placed on the table. Four of them were already playing including my friend. All of them were sighted except me. I became very curious to play but controlled my mind as there was no place for me to play. My mind promptly whisked to my school days. I completed my schooling in a special school which is exclusively meant for visually challenged students. I was incredulous when every class was given carrom and chess board in my school. I was really surprised to accept the capability of visually challenged seniors playing carrom board. I was taught. I didn’t show much interest in the beginning. But, later, I became used to it. Even a state player has played with us when she came to our school. It’s very simple. The visually challenged player has to be told the color of the coin and the line of the board if he/she places the striker wrongly. The rest will be taken care of.

Coming back to the incident, two of them left among the four as they had to reach home. Only two of them were playing the game. I was sitting aloof amidst the two. I asked but denied a chance to play. My friend might have thought that I was a novice in carroms. He might have thought that I was incapable of playing it. This world will accept only when we prove the capability of ourselves. But, the painful fact is the deliberate denial of chance. I am reminded of an interesting incident when I mention the word ‘chance’

When we were doing our post graduation, I had a painful incident which really spoiled my sleep on that night. We were asked to go for a special session as a woman came as a guest lecturer. I somewhat remember what she taught. Simultaneously, I still remember what she did to me.

We entered in to the hall. She started her speech. Sooner, the class became very active and alive. She made everybody contribute. She didn’t want anybody to be left. She invited everybody on stage one after another. Some of them felt shy. She didn’t leave them. Her motive was to train them and make them become extravert. She asked everybody a different question. She asked the names of everybody. She asked a person on my right, on my left, on my front except me. In the beginning, I thought she was not doing deliberately. Later realized the truth. Her questions were random and sometimes in an order. Nonetheless, she didn’t want anybody to be left. At one point of time, I noticed that she called the person on my right and sooner on my left without forgetting to avoid me. She was a good trainer I agree. The session got over. My classmates were keen to take photographs with her. She also wanted the same. I stood somewhere in the corner. Some of my classmates noted her phone number also. I came out with one of the introvert guy in the class. She might have thought that this visually challenged okay... Okay... in her point of view, Blind guy was fit for nothing. If I were an empty chair she would have given minimum recognition. I became extremely furious after coming out of the hall. I really wanted to shout the quote of Osho at her in the end for her ill-treatment by saying ‘I’m not superior to you, I’m not inferior to you and I’m not equal to you either. I’ve come to find myself and you’ve come to find yourself’ and the quote goes like that. I’m reminded of a book when I write about a quote here. It wasn’t an ordinary book rather a slam book.

As usual, majority of my postgraduate classmates brought their slam books in the end of the semester to be filled by others. They wanted to know the thoughts and experiences of others about themselves. I felt very happy when people approached me to write about them. They asked me how I would write for them. I said I would type and take print out. They said they would stick it in their books with joy.

One of them was completely different to me. She was roaming inside the classroom with her slam book. She asked everybody to write about her. She did it whenever she was free or whenever the class was free without professor. I kept on observing her. She never came to me. One of my friends asked me casually about the concern girl whether she approached me to write a slam book or not. I said she would come. He asked her. She hesitated.

“How can I ask him to write?” She whispered. It was completely out of sympathy. Plenty of ways were there to get my opinion about her. She could have asked somebody to write when I dictate. She could have asked me to record it and give. She could have asked me to tell orally so that she could take down in her own slam book. If nothing was possible, she could have come and approached me about any possibility as I was her classmate for two precious years.

It is acceptable that a sighted person show sympathy on a visually challenged person. Everybody does it in the beginning. But, it should change at least to some extent in due course of time. I was completely shocked to see a girl who shoed 100% sympathy even after observing me for a couple of years. My friend told her that I would type and give her to stick it on the slam book if she wished. She said okay. I typed a slam book for her and mailed. I’ve written the following lines in the slam book.

‘Let me tell you from my sincere heart. I am really crucified by your cruel kindness (excessive love and affection) which sustained throughout the course. Each and every drop of blood of mine is grateful for your kindness. I am completely swept and lost by your stream of sympathy and incessant mercy. I am really indebted to you for taking care of me like a new born child.’

I don’t know whether she understood the intended meaning of those words or not. But, I understood that it is very difficult for a blind man to be recognized as a human to all in the society. Even majority of the movies, which are considered to be reflection of a particular society, portray visually challenged people based on imagination which lead to more sympathy on them. I’ve no ideas about Hollywood and other movies. But, majority of our Tamil movies portrayed them either as an character of sympathy or an actor of illogic.

A beautiful incident comes to my mind when I mention about movies. I like watching movies. Most of the visually challenged viewers have the habit of watching movies like sighted audience. Some of them asked how you watch movies. I accept their question with the open heart. The question has to be asked. I’ve clarified the interrogators’ doubts in many circumstances. But, this was slightly different. One of my close friends, with whom I had gone to few movies, came up with the strange definition about watching movies.

When I was talking to him once, the topic moved to recent movies. I suggested a recent film which was really worth watchable. He said his friends watched and they slept in the middle. He also said that they didn’t like the movie. I still argued that the movie was worth enough to watch and suggested him to watch. Most of the time he’d ask me the quality of the movie before going to theater. Our opinion would be similar in nature many times. What was in his mind on that day I never knew. Immediately he started saying to me,

“See vinoth, what you people are watching is really not movies.” He paused, I nodded and he continued.

“The actual movie is not what you are watching.” He paused a second.

“Story.” I said.

“No. What you are watching is not even a story either.” He paused and immediately said. “Script. Just a script.” He finished.

He didn’t even watch that movie. His friends had watched and commented on it. And, he was arguing based on that. I didn’t drop a single word after that.

“What happened?” He asked me after a minute.

I smiled and said nothing.

A visually challenged person may not be able to understand the visual sequences of the movie. But, he/she is not as weak as to understand the plot and the concept of the movie. He should have known it as a friend of mine. What to do? Sometimes, strangers behave like friends and vice-versa.